Hate Mail

I have arrived! I got my first piece of vicious hate mail.

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Let’s break it down. Shall we?

It would be a spectacular feeling if I could just punch that arrogant smirk you have on your face at all times.

(smirking) I hope you licked the Doritos dust off your fingers before typing this message. I know it was a tough day for you. Your Xbox froze while playing online with kids half your age. Your elderly mother is nagging you about the smell in basement “apartment.” Then, you read that Ben Affleck will be the next Batman. Take a deep breath. Violence is never the answer.

Your blog is nothing more than mindless drivel. Boring. Just another idiot on the internet who voices their opinion.

Clearly, you are a dedicated reader. Thank you!

You’re a dime a dozen. You old ass bitch.

Ha! A dermatologist can (and does) correct that problem on a regular basis. I bet he can help your skin issues, too. Your weight problem will take a little more work.

Feel free to drop Phil a line:

pbandjbrooks@gmail.com

Sheep Protest

I find many protests laughable. I covered my fair share while working in local news. It’s the same group of people at every one. I don’t know if they are passionate about the cause or just unemployed. If you want to make a difference donate to a charity or volunteer. Besides, do you really think holding a poorly made sign on a street corner is going to convince the President of the United States to end a war? I’m just sayin… This protest really made me chuckle:

Cheesy Potatoes

When my husband and I were first married I boiled steaks. I am not kidding. I had no idea how to cook. My Mom wasn’t exactly a gourmet chef. We knew dinner was done when the smoke alarm went off. My Dad usually cooked. He is incredible and has taught me a lot. He is also difficult to please so I was amazed when he complimented a recent dish I made. I found this recipe online for Cheesy Potatoes. It’s too good not to share.

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Here is the recipe:

2 lbs. frozen hash browns thawed (diced)

1 cup butter

1 cup sour cream

1 can cream of chicken soup

1 cup shredded cheddar cheese

1/4 cup diced onion

Salt & pepper to taste

1. Defrost potatoes, melt butter & mix together all ingredients

2. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour in
9 x 13 baking dish

Enjoy!

Elvis Impersonator

Whenever I hear an Elvis song I think of my grandmother. I can still see her dancing around the dining room table while his music played on her eight track player. It was bitchin’. There was plexiglass on the bottom half and disco lights would flash to the beat. Rewind? Fast forward? Nope. You had to click around through each song. My grandma was a feisty red head. God, I miss that woman. My Mom has the same love for The King. She will get a kick out of this little girl rocking out in her car seat. Watch the whole thing. It is funny.

I want my Prancercise

John Mayer is a bit of a tool, but his new music video is fantastic.  He got the Prancercise lady to be the star.  Joanna Rohrback, 61, created the exercise which she describes as A springy, rhythmic way of moving forward,similar to a horse’s gait and ideally induced by elation.  It looks ridiculous, but must work. Who else do you know who can wear a belt with Spandex? I know people in passing cars must be asking themselves, “What the hell is that lady doing?”  This video will go viral, but does anyone hear the song?

 

 

Memorable Dessert

I have never quite understood the fascination with photo cakes.   You will eventually have to butcher someone you love.  Who wants to eat Grandpa’s ear?  Yet, time and time again I see them at parties.  I must admit they do taste good.  There is something about that damn butter cream frosting.  I ordered my son a Batman cake a few years ago that looked like something you would see on “Cake Boss.”  The characters were made with fondant. The attention to detail was amazing, but it tasted like the bottom of sneaker.  Well, what I assume the bottom of a sneaker would taste like.

Here is a memorable dessert.  A mother in Indiana ordered a graduation cake for her daughter.  She wanted a “small cap”  on her daughter’s head.  The person who took the order heard something completely different.  The result is fantastic.

 

NBC News anchor Brian Williams raps

Who knew? NBC News anchor Brian Williams can rap. (Sort of) Here he is doing Snoop Dog’s “Nuthin’ But a G Thang.” I think he means There isn’t anything like a G thing. I wonder what Snoop Dog thinks of Williams’ rendition. Wait, he isn’t a dog anymore, right? He’s a lion. Is Prince still a symbol? I can’t keep track. Anyway, enjoy this clip: