My 12-year-old accidentally ordered a channel with our digital cable box. He thought he was buying a movie. I still haven’t figured out how many buttons he pushed to make this happen. I planned to cancel it. Unfortunately, I got wrapped up in my weekend getaway and forgot. Big mistake. It turns out the station that plays family friendly movies during the day features soft core porn after dark. So, we learned the hard way (no pun intended) that it’s not a good idea to fall asleep with the TV on. If you do, your 5-year-old may be exposed to something he should not see.
Perhaps this time Clifford was chasing my son in his sleep. (I love how nobody in Birdwell Island ever calls the authorities. I can tell you if a giant dog crushed my car I would be calling 911.)
Whatever the reason, while the rest of the family slept, my soon to be kindergartner rushed into our bedroom at 3 a.m. after having another nightmare. On the screen, two unattractive women and a Burt Reynolds look alike were pretending to fondle each other. Clifford was no longer an issue. My son asked, “Why are those naked women doing that?” I can’t bring myself to have “the talk” with a tween. I am not lecturing my 5-year-old. It goes without saying, but I am canceling that station today.