I have been told I am not “an animal person.” In reality I am not “a pet hair, animal saliva, dog feces person.” I don’t enjoy cleaning any one of these things. It’s not that I hate animals. In fact, we have a dog, Max. Here he is after tearing through the garbage and trying to eat the wrapper of a Hershey’s bar. I know dogs aren’t supposed to eat chocolate. Don’t worry. I licked that sucker clean: We got Max last Christmas. It seemed like such a good idea at the time. The kids were overjoyed. A year later Max still enjoys taking a random s*** in the house.…