Virtual Learning

I used to dread having to get my children ready for school. Packing a lunch is emotionally draining. What will he/she eat? What do I need to put in the lunchbox to appear to be a health conscious mother?  We all know damn well my children are going to throw the carrots in the garbage can. What food group does a Lunchable fall into?

A child will wake up during the week at 6 a.m. ready to conquer the world, but on a school day they are practically comatose. I am also one of those rare animals who still irons clothing. Yes, I own an iron and I use it. It’s a sickness I inherited from my mother. So, I would have to iron clothes for school at night or early in the morning.

Looking back, that all seems like a walk in the park. Virtual Learning is hell. I would rank it with glitter and Caillou – both sent directly from Satan himself. I have so much empathy for teachers trying to educate children through the World Wide Web. They should be making millions. We have had a child playing Cardi B’s “WAP” over his speaker. That is beyond anything taught in sex ed. Most kids aren’t paying attention when the teacher is talking. Thank God for Google because I don’t think they are learning much. The wifi intermittently drops out. Kids have large breaks in the day to play video games. My son’s NBA team is dominating. The worst part for me is the snacks. I get text messages a million times a day about snacks. They want a snack. They want a drink. They went an entire school day in class without a bite to eat besides lunch. Now, that they are home these kids are famished. My grocery bill has skyrocketed. My patience is dwindling. I would rather watch a marathon of Caillou then do this another year.

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