• Dora the Gangster

    My daughter has learned a lot from Dora the Explorer. She knows “Hola” means “Hello.” From time to time she butchers the Spanish language by making up words. “Bolanenero, Molameno” apparently means “Let’s Go!” Swiper taught her you can’t trust everyone and have to protect your stuff. She may be taking things a little too far. This morning she loaded up her backpack for our daily adventure:   After we got past the damn troll (who does this guy think he is trying to stop an unsupervised young girl and his monkey from crossing bridges?) I discovered this in her backpack. I think she got the Nickelodeon show confused with…

  • Wake up Call

    I woke up this morning with my 4-year-old tugging on my arm and whispering in my face, “Wake up Mommy.” His breath smelled like he ate garbage for dinner, an onion for dessert and gargled with toilet water. My kids are mouth breathers. He came into my bedroom in the middle of the night after having a nightmare. What does a 4-year-old have nightmares about? He couldn’t remember. Perhaps he went with Dora to save a princess and The Map gave them wrong directions. Or maybe the cops finally arrested Dora’s parents on child endangerment charges because Dora is wandering the earth without adult supervision. Regardless, he came running in…