My 2-year-old daughter wants to go live with Suzie. She hasn’t called to reserve a UHaul yet. This was a rash decision, made out of anger. After a long day, which included a fun birthday party at the zoo, she was extremely tired. In situations like this I would normally say “screw bath time,” but, at one point tonight, she was in close proximity to Rhino shit. So, I peeled off her clothing and plopped her in the bathtub. She was kicking and screaming, “I don’t like you anymore. I’m going to live with Suzie.” It would be an impossible move since Suzie doesn’t exist. Suzie came into our lives…