Public Training

I have heard of parents taking extreme measures to potty train children. One family put a 3-month-old on the toilet and swore the child was learning. The baby would pee anywhere if he/she wasn’t wearing a diaper. The potty training story I read about today tops that. A mother in Utah decided to potty train her twins in a public restaurant. Initially, other patrons thought the kids were sitting on booster seats. Well, that is until the toddlers were stripped down to their bare bottoms.

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Any mother knows you are essentially on house arrest while potty training. You put your child on the toilet every hour or so. In the meantime you watch them like a hawk for a sign they have to go. My daughter would crouch on the ground like Yogi Berra. I would ask, “Do you need to poop on the potty?” She would lie to my face. “Nope,” she grunted as her face turned a bright shade of red. At this point you carry them to the bathroom faster than an Olympian on steroids.

You don’t go to the store or a restaurant until they’ve mastered the skill. I would have to imagine potty training your kids at a table inside a public restaurant violates some public health codes. It is also extremely gross. Did she think nobody would notice? Shit smells like shit no matter how old you are.