All I want for Christmas is….

I am out twenty-five bucks.  I had to hide it under my daughter’s pillow in exchange for a baby tooth.  I know that is a lot.  I made a rookie mistake that cost me.  

Being the tooth fairy isn’t easy.  My brain is mush by the time I put my children to bed at night.  Now, I have to low crawl into a room and put cash under a pillow without waking my kid up? I will tackle anyone who makes too much noise after bedtime.  

This time I forgot to make the drop before I fell asleep.  I woke up in a panic.  I creeped into my daughter’s room in the wee hours of the morning.  She was tossing and turning. So, I shoved a $5 bill under her pillow and got the hell out of there.  Heaven forbid my children realize that a tiny fairy doesn’t actually collect their disgusting teeth.  It really is such an odd concept. According to Wikipedia, the tradition actually dates back to 1908 and we know everything on the internet is true.  

My daughter woke up in the morning, discovered the cash and her tooth. Damn it!  I paid money, but left the product behind.   I didn’t expect her next move.  

She wanted to double dip and drafted this note that night:


I only had $20 in my wallet.  Since she no longer accepts checks, she scored twenty bills. I was actually behind a woman who wrote a check at the grocery store this week.  There was a collective sigh from the bakery to the meat department.  A few twenty-somethings in line were confused.  “What is she doing?”

My daughter was giddy when she woke up and found more money.  She ran down the hall waving the bill in the air.  “Mommy, I can buy some new Shopkins,” she said with a lisp.  Her toothless smile made my heart skip a beat.  She is growing up so fast.  I would pay $25 and more to make time slow down.   

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