PB&J brawl

I read this story and giggled.

DES MOINES — A man was arrested Friday after an angry confrontation with his brother over his eating habits, according to a police report.

The two brothers, in their 50s, live together in Des Moines.

The alleged victim told police that his brother, Jerome Davis, “made three peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and ate them in the living room. Within the next hour, the suspect made another 3 of these peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, bringing his total consumption of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to six. This angered the victim…”

The victim confronted Davis about over-eating, which quickly escalated. “Both victim and suspect began yelling about the other being lazy and ‘eating again,'” police reported.

Davis then pulled out a folding knife and held it to the face of his brother, threatening to cut him, according to the report.

No, it’s not funny to threaten another person’s life, especially not your brother, but this fight is comical. I guess it’s because I can relate. Do you know how you feel when you have washed and folded the same pair of underwear for the third time in one week? How about that moment every damn morning when you pick his socks up off the floor? You know, the socks that are in the exact same spot and inches away from a clothes hamper. What about when your significant other decides to eat nacho chips in a quiet room at the wrong time of the month? That is how the other brother felt.

I would have been aggravated by the peanut butter & jelly, too. The smell, the smacking sound and the damn knife in the sink day after day after day would drive anyone  crazy. Why is it that Dawn dish detergent can remove oil from penguins, but not peanut butter? You could soak a peanut butter covered knife for a year and it wouldn’t come clean. It just changes color. Can you blame the guy for reaching his breaking point?