Supermom

I took my boys to the theater today to see Avengers. I thought about streaming it online, but Mommy can’t break the law. Blah, Blah Blah. I’ve never really been a fan of Superheroes. It’s completely unrealistic for a man to have superhuman hearing, breath or vision. My husband doesn’t hear me when I ask him to take out the garbage. His breath smells like expired feta cheese in the morning. He clearly can’t see the basket of laundry that needs to be folded.

The theater wasn’t packed, but there was a good crowd. A mixture of parents, children and 30-something men who play Magic: The Gathering. Of course, I managed to pick the seats in front of a pig that likes to burp and blow. You know, the guy who not only belches out loud, but then blows the air so that the stench smacks you in the face. Delightful. I felt victorious that the attendant didn’t realize I hid popcorn and soda in my purse. I know, it’s not what Coach intended. (Or Coach Factory, whatever) I will be damn if I pay for snacks after dishing out a small fortune for tickets.

How was the movie? Long. I can say my children were grinning from ear to ear. There were several funny lines. Oh, and I guess the Avengers saved the world. (Sorry to ruin the ending.) I can tell you the actor who played Molly Ringwald’s drunk father in Pretty in Pink was a security guard. I was delighted by the casting director’s choice to play Thor. This guy is a young Brad Pitt with a beautiful body. I would rather see an adult film. Get your mind out of the gutter. By adult, I mean with a believable plot, swearing and Ryan Gosling. However, I wouldn’t have changed a thing. I enjoyed quality time with my boys. They were happy. Roll the credits.

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