Wacko Jacko

“What do we want?”
“Katherine freed!”
“When do we want it?”

What? Katherine Jackson wasn’t kidnapped? She’s relaxing at a spa in Arizona? Apparently the Jackson family matriarch just needed a little rest. I guess all that breakdancing got to her. Perhaps, she was chillin in a hyperbaric chamber. It’s totally normal for grandma to disappear without a trace. Then, reappear in what looks like a SoCal terrorist video. I believe her statement about as much as I’d believe Kim Kardashian is a virgin. For the love of Bubbles the chimp, can’t y’all just act normal.

I wish my kids knew the Jacksons before they drank crazy juice. I recall screaming with glee when Michael took off his sunglasses at the Grammy’s. I rocked pleather pants and a shirt with a glittered glove smack across my chest. Hell yeah, my name was printed on the back. My first cassette tape was Janet Jackson’s album “Control.” I even went to the Jackson 5 reunion concert. The younger generation knows nothing about their musical talent. My son can’t name a single song. He can tell you they are “weird” which unfortunately is true.


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