Lunchbox breach

I’m saving up bail money now. My son may end up in the pokey. At 5-years-ol he is already breaking rules set by school officials. The crime? He is sharing food at the lunch table. I know, what kind of animal am I raising? I realize why schools frown upon children sharing food in the cafeteria. We don’t know if Billy’s Mom packs spoiled meat. We wouldn’t want the entire class getting food poisoning. The problem is I have edited the food pyramid and dessert is at the top. So, my kid gets a sweet treat in his lunch everyday. It may be a piece of chocolate, fruit snack or cookie. The other kids wait, with bated breath, for him to unzip his Batman lunch pail. Well, it’s not really a pail. What is this 1950? What do the kids call it these days? A tote? Anyway, each day one of his classmates enjoys a treat on my dime. My son told me yesterday, “John (names have been changed to protect the innocent) really, really, really wanted part of my cookie. So, I waited until the lunch lady turned around and gave him a piece.” My son says John has never had a cookie before. Is his mom a supermodel? I’m calling bulls*** on that one. John is a liar. My son is thoughtful, but he needs to follow the rules, right? To quote my 3-year-old daughter, “Too bad so sad” for the other kids.

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