Just when I thought Caillou was the worst thing on earth my daughter discovered “Shopkins.” If you are not aware this is the hottest new toy for young girls. I know it’s politically incorrect to assign a gender to toys, but I’ve yet to meet a boy who likes “Shopkins.”
The figurines are the size of a quarter. Each is an item you could buy at a store, but has a face. It’s the stuff nightmares are made of. Here is an example of one overpriced package:
There are boots, food, whatever the hell is in the middle of this package, etc. What do they do? I can tell you each one hurts like hell if you step on it. It also takes what seems like an eternity to find a missing “Shopkin.” I can’t explain why children are drawn to this toy. For goodness sake, in the 80s a creepy, talking bear was a hot seller. We also liked babies born in cabbage. I will buy tiny figurines and things like Pokemon cards, but I have to draw the line somewhere. I will not be buying this:
This is Lammily, also known as “Normal Barbie” and the “realistic fashion doll.” I appreciate a doll with cellulite and normal waist. However, I will not purchase the new $10 “Period Party Extension Kit.” I’m not kidding. The creator of this doll decided it was a good idea for Lammily to get her menstrual cycle and it’s a party. I don’t remember cake and streamers the first time I bled.
This is an excerpt from an article in Time magazine:
Described as “the fun way to explain the menstrual cycle to kids,” creator Nickolay Lamm wants to start a conversation about periods and the stigmas that surround it.
The kit comes with an educational pamphlet explaining what to expect from a menstrual cycle plus a pair of doll underwear, 19 colored pads, a calendar and stickers to track periods.
I don’t want my daughter to learn about one of life’s milestones from a doll. Actually, I’m not ready to teach my 5-year-old about a menstrual cycle. She loses her mind over a scratch. In fact, the mere sight of blood sends her over the edge. There isn’t a candy bar in the universe to calm a first grader who found out she will bleed once a month for decades. Call me crazy, but I want her to enjoy being a kid. What’s next? Ken gets a prostate exam? Skipper gets mammogram?
It’s ridiculous. Besides, can you imagine how much time I would spend looking for misplaced miniature maxi pads.