• Hairy situation

    July 10, 2013 /

    It is one of the great mysteries in life. How is it you can shave your legs regularly, but miss the same spot over and over again? You never notice it in the shower. The patch of hair can only be seen when you are in a public place. For me, that was at the dentist’s office. I made an appointment because of a toothache. It turns out a piece of a filling cracked. The dentist says I “might as well have a root canal.” Might as well? You might as well eat French fries. You might as well have another cocktail. You don’t might as well have needles stick…

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  • Binders Full of Women

    October 16, 2012 /

    Oh Mitt, Mitt, Mitt.   Clearly, you didn’t listen to your mother when she told you to “think before you speak.”   First, you allude to firing Big Bird.  Then, you reveal you keep women in binders? I barely have enough room for coupons in a binder.  I think we need to focus on the issues, but this is funny:

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  • STFU people without kids

    October 8, 2012 /

    Believe me. I get annoyed with parents writing posts about their perfect children. I know it’s all BS and your child is really Satan. However, I actually enjoy looking at pictures my friends post on Facebook of their kids. Blair Koenig does not. This chick started a blog called STFU Parents. We all know a Blair. She is the bitter woman who doesn’t have children. She may not want them. Perhaps she is jealous because much of her adult life has been spent on a bar stool or hugging porcelain. Some of her stuff is really funny, but some of it is mean. There is a simple solution. Adjust the…

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  • Satan’s Whip

    September 11, 2012 /

    I saw this fly ride on my way to pick up up my son. When I last saw my 5-year-old this morning he was crying as his teacher peeled him off my leg. He isn’t feeling the whole kindergarten thing. He told me he “knows his colors and can count to 10. So, what’s the point?” Oh, I don’t know. The last time I checked you can’t list your knowledge of the rainbow as a skill on a resume. Doesn’t it just warm your heart to see a truck labeled “Satan’s Ride II” parked near an elementary school? It has to make you wonder what “Satan’s Ride I” looked like.…

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