Baby Got Back
Jimmy Fallon is a genius. This is proof:
Middle school football team’s life-changing play
This story is just awesome! Meet the Olivet Eagles, a middle-school football team from Olivet, Mich., who with the help of a learning disabled teammate, executed what may be one of the most successful plays of all time.
My son graduated yesterday. I cried. Actually, I was on the verge of sobbing. My lower lip was quivering, snot dripping from my nose and tears streaming down my face. Thank goodness another mother was cracking jokes or I would have made a complete fool of myself. Did I mention this was a kindergarten graduation ceremony? I couldn’t help it. It seems like just yesterday he was a chubby 10-month-old crawling on the floor. He is the middle child so I didn’t raise him in a bubble like my first born. With your first kid you boil everything. The second and third could eat dirt and you shrug it off.…
Allow me to rephrase that
I feel dirty. I just called my father to ask if he would watch my daughter while I picked up my 5-year-old son from school. I knew he would say yes, but offered a bribe anyway. “If you come over I will give you a body wash,” I said. “What?” he sounded confused. “I will give you a body wash,” I repeated in a sweeter voice. He seemed disgusted, “You will give me a what?” I have a closet of toiletries from extreme couponing. We won’t have to buy deodorant ever again. Need floss? I got you covered. Earlier today my father asked, “Do you have anymore of that soap…
I try to keep up with modern technology. My phone is smart. I regularly use hip text lingo. LOL. However, I just learned I am stuck in the 90’s when it comes to surfing the web. I didn’t get the memo that you no longer have to type “www” to access a website. My husband saw me logging on to the world wide web and asked, “What are you doing?” Nobody calls it the world wide web anymore? “You don’t have to type www,” he chuckled. I moved my pocketbook and sat down on the Davenport to catch my breath. Am I really that old? I did get a typewriter…
She is sick. Run!
My children are going through withdrawal. I didn’t take away potato chips or candy. Their video game consoles are still intact. Geez, I am not a monster. I took away their grandparents. It had to be done. My mother has the flu. Of course, I am concerned about her well being. This woman gave birth to me. She is my best friend. However, I will admit the first thing that came to mind was “I hope the kids don’t get it.” I can take a cough. There is medicine to treat a fever. I can’t deal with three kids projectile vomiting. God created the vomit virus so the world wasn’t…
My son’s homework assignment brought back a flood of memories. His class is reading the coming of age novel, “The Outsiders.” The assignment was to complete the first chapter and list descriptions of each character. I told him I had a poster of Ponyboy and Johnny on my wall when I was younger. I think I cut it out of Tiger Beat Magazine. Whatever happened to C. Thomas Howell anyway? Me: “The Outsiders was made into a movie in the 80’s” My son: “You were alive in the 1980’s?” Me: “Yes. I was alive.” My son: “Wow. Did the movie have any special effects?” Me: “No, but it was a…