Coupon insert = entertainment

It is no secret that I love coupons. I am a rookie extreme couponer. I don’t have 90 cans of peas in my pantry, but I could supply deodorant for an entire NFL team. I just bought three 12 packs of Bounty paper towels and a bottle of Tylenol for $6.30. Bam! Do you know what I love even more than scoring a high value coupon? The advertisements that are included in the Sunday inserts. They bring me so much joy. Please allow me to explain why.

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The model is saying “Ta-dah! For $19.99 you can look like you are 50 years older, too.” Put these on and you won’t need to show ID to get a senior citizen discount at McDonald’s.

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Have you been searching for the perfect knick knack to sit on the shelf beside your collection of Precious Moments figurines? The hunt is over. Who doesn’t want a talking monkey in a pink dress? You’re welcome.

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Cancel that appointment with the gynecologist. This is better than birth control. Have your man throw on a pair of these elastic waist pants and problem solved.

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These shoes say “I would rather be comfortable than look attractive.” Her online dating profile includes “Must be willing to massage my bunions.”

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Money can’t buy you class, but it can get you a ceramic elephant.

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