Look up……

I laughed when I read this article :

Here is an excerpt:

I Look Down On Young Women With Husbands And Kids And I’m Not Sorry


Do people really think that a stay at home mom is really on equal footing with a woman who works and takes care of herself?

blah, blah, blah….

Having kids and getting married are considered life milestones. We have baby showers and wedding parties as if it’s a huge accomplishment and cause for celebration to be able to get knocked up or find someone to walk down the aisle with. These aren’t accomplishments, they are actually super easy tasks, literally anyone can do them. They are the most common thing, ever, in the history of the world. They are, by definition, average. And here’s the thing, why on earth are we settling for average?

blah, blah, blah….

If women can do anything, why are we still content with applauding them for doing nothing?



Her post is offensive, but I am not angry.  I have met the person she will become.  She is a lonely woman with a lot of regrets.  She sometimes lingers at the grocery store to avoiding going home alone at night.  She dreads the holidays.   She accomplished her career goals, but doesn’t feel successful.  In fact, she encourages young women not to make the same mistake.   Success isn’t defined by your title.  I worked for a decade in the TV news industry before deciding to stay home with my children.  It was one of the most difficult decisions I have ever made.  Was I a quitter? Quite the contrary.  I got a promotion.  I am home when my children wake up in the morning.  I put them to bed at night.  My work assignments can be taxing.  Have you ever tried to put pants on a toddler who has declared, “Princesses don’t wear underwear?”  Have you ever sat at a kitchen table for an hour trying to help a 6-year-old understand his math lesson while he complains in a Gilbert Gottfried-esque voice?

Sure, cooking, cleaning and doing laundry is not difficult. It sucks, but it’s not hard.  The hard part of my job is being a parent.  It’s not easy to put someone else before yourself.  We aren’t programmed that way.   It’s not easy to be strong when your child is sick or struggling.  It’s not easy to stay calm when they are whining or crying.

I actually applaud women who climb the corporate ladder if  that is what makes them happy.  However, I would argue it’s pretty common for women to do so. This isn’t the 1800’s.   I feel sorry for women who put a career before finding love and/or having a family.   The truth is nobody will care about your promotion in ten years. In fact, the name plate on your office door will probably belong to someone else. My children will remember that I was there for school concerts, field trips, birthdays, sporting events, etc.  My job is important and when I retire I will have an abundance of beautiful memories.   Amy will (the way things are going) only have a few bucks in her 401k.   I would offer to trade places with her for a day, but I don’t think she could handle it.  She thinks taking care of herself is difficult.  Being alone is easy.  That is the path of least resistance.






  • Kelly

    I love how you wrote this! Better than I could have ever said it. It is amazing how many pitying looks you get when you tell people you are a stay at home mom, but they have no clue.

  • ada

    So, by your logic, your life is good or bad depending upon how many people are there with you? Is that why you had kids? Just so you wouldn’t be alone?

    That’s fine if that’s your real argument… just wondering.

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