I may have just taken out a 12-year-old in street hockey. It was an accident. My son and his friends were trying to organize a game. However, they needed another player to even out the teams. So, I offered to be goalie. They chuckled and said, “Really?” Damn Straight! Well, I actually said, “Sure, why not? You think I can’t play because I am a girl?” Silence. I could tell by the look on their faces it had nothing to do with gender. They thought I was too old. I grabbed a stick and got into position. After the puck went by me not once, but three times I suggested…

Are you kidding me? Kids these days can’t even make their own jewelry? I remember spending hours weaving these things. I actually had a hobby as a kid. Yeah, I may have been the awkward girl who never got asked to dance. So what! The boy who ignored me is fat, bald and working at a mall kiosk. The popular girls look like Carnie Wilson before the 1st and 2nd gastric bypass surgery. As a child I played with toys and enjoyed being outside. Nowadays I have to pry my son’s hands off his Ipod. If I need to punish him I confiscate the electronics. You would think I was…

I have decided that I need to share the Spam comments I receive with you on a weekly basis. They are hilarious. Also because if I didn’t share the spam I wouldn’t have any comments. So, all 3 of you devoted readers out there are in for a treat.   “this post was very well written, and it also contains many useful facts because the author have made it very easy for us to understand. right?” Honey, if you are not sure. Neither am I.   “I’ll immediately clutch your rss as I can not in finding your email subscription link or newsletter service.” Clutch my ass…. maybe, but keep…

At least this guy was honest. More than I can say for some men. (and women) It’s kind of funny. Kind of gross. (His kids must be so proud.) But hey, I guess it was his life. I hope there are booze, guns and cars in Heaven for this fella.   Published in Denver Post on April 12, 2012 Michael “Flathead” Blanchard | Visit Guest Book Blanchard, Michael “Flathead” 1944 ~ 2012 A Celebration of the life of Michael “Flathead” Blanchard will be held on April 14th, 3 pm 8160 Rosemary St, Commerce City. Weary of reading obituaries noting someone’s courageous battle with death, Mike wanted it known that he…

I have been craving eggs lately. No, I’m not pregnant. I just love breakfast. Well, I love food. I have been running lately though. A friend asked me if I was training for a race. I’m training to get out of the “My ass jiggles after I stop walking” club. A girl still has to eat. This looks delicious and somewhat easy to make. www.pinterest.com  

I remember when I finally taught my son how to walk. I sat on the floor with my husband at the other end of the room. I was bursting with excitement and it was contagious. My son giggled as he took off. I looked directly into his bright blue eyes. I had never loved someone this much. He was nervous, but I sensed he trusted me. After a half a dozen wobbly steps I wrapped my arms around him, praising this accomplishment. I got teary eyed at the idea that my baby was growing up. I could not have imagined how quickly time would pass. Tonight we reached another milestone.…

There was a time in my life when I went clubbing on the weekends. I spent hours getting ready. I had to choose the perfect outfit. Then, of course I needed time to pin my jeans. Right about now those younger than Generation X are scratching their heads. See, back in the day we made our own skinny jeans with safety pins. I believe I would use around 8 or so on each leg. What? That’s ridiculous you say? Well, at least it was only women. Who the hell decided that skinny jeans were a good idea for men? Sir, I don’t want to see the outline of your ball…

What a great gift this would make: www.etsy.com

I have a great blog post, but I am honestly too tired to write it. It’s a combination of a long day of work and my daughter waking up last night at 3 a.m. demanding Quackers. She meant crackers. Fish crackers. They are like crack really. She can’t get enough. I’m thinking of having an intervention with her grandparents, siblings and the kid she tried to shake down for fish crackers at the park. Anyway, here is something funny so I can go to sleep: www.buzzfeed.com